Historical Trauma

I am very passionate about historical trauma.

 

There's something about a person being in pain from things outside of their control and to carry that pain, shame and sometimes guilt for a long time, that feels heartbreaking to me. It's too much of a burden to bear.

Sometimes we suffer trauma in life and we bury the pain of that trauma deep inside.

The problem is it comes back up, again and again, it doesn't ever seem to go away, it haunts us.

The feelings get buried alive, but never die.

I feel this is truly tragic and so unfair.

Not only did you have to suffer the trauma in the first place, you then are never free of it and I have such empathy for this and want to help you heal from that pain. 

This is why a safe space is critical for you to talk in, along with trust in me. Trust that I won't judge you. Trust that you won't be engulfed by the emotions that you dare to look at. Trust that counselling will help you find the healing you desperately seek. 

As human beings we are vulnerable. We are vulnerable as children, partners, employees, patients or clients. It's a brave step to feel that vulnerability and to face it, but it's a step toward healing. Our vulnerability is our core. If we connect with our core, we truly connect with ourselves. To feel peace. 

I enjoy working with adults who either, don't know why they feel the way they do,  or,  know how they feel and bottle up the emotions and use coping mechanisms like work, alcohol, anger etc to deal with those emotions instead.

I am acutely aware that men do feel pain but can hold onto it and keep it tucked away to no one can see it. This can have devastating effects on Relationships, Health or Life. I work hard to provide a safe environment to express all emotions and for you to feel it's ok to do so.

Hopefully this goes some way to explain my sincere desire to work deeply with you, in your journey and to help you experience a different life... with scars instead of open wounds.

Relationship Issues 

Relationships can be very stressful or difficult and this is relevant in families, friendships, colleaugues and partners.

Space to talk about these difficulties can bring perspective and clarity.

 

In romantic relationships we can often lose ourselves and become confused over what we really want from our relationship or our life. Expectations of others and ourselves complicate things and guilt is something that controls a lot of what we do.

 

Sometimes we just don't understand our partner or what they need. Sometimes we have to forgive an affair, a betrayal or we have to learn to live with a diagnosis.

 

The pain of this can be unbearable. I want to hold this pain with you. Help you feel strong enough to handle the feelings that come your way.

Expectations in family or friend relationships also hinder what we do...when... how...even why we do things. We can feel trapped, controlled, betrayed, disapproved of, or that we just don't fit.

I feel very passionate about people being true to themselves, while battling the demands of others by gaining an understanding of who you are, who you want to be and feeling comfortable in your own skin.

People can have 'different faces for different places' and yet we are just one person. I want you to be one person wherever you go and to be happy and celebrate who that person is inside you.

You have a right to be YOU. Counselling can help you find 'you' again.

Anxiety & Panic

So many people are struggling with Anxiety and Panic attacks now. So many hopes and dreams being stolen by the beast we call...Anxiety.

 

Beta blockers, mindfulness and meditation are becoming mainstream. Anxiety is rife, perhaps because of the expectations we have on ourselves, the fast pace of life or our belief that everyone else is coping and so we must keep up. 

I believe there is a life outside of anxiety.

 

I believe and have seen first hand and through my clients that anxiety does not have to be a part of who you are. It can be something that comes along uninvited, that you can gain control over and dismiss it on its way. 

 

Now don't get me wrong, there is a fight in this, but this is the fight to get your life back. A question I would ask is... Do you want your life back? or is your anxiety a tool you can hide behind?

 

There are no right or wrong answers here, because if you are hiding from your life, anxiety is the perfect medium. As a counsellor I would guess that if you are hiding from your life then there is a reason and that reason can often be fear, pain or disappointment.

Through counselling healing can be sought and then you can work on getting rid of the anxiety to get your life back. 

 

Anxiety is a cruel monster that takes away your life and leaves with a comfort zone that just gets smaller and smaller unless you fight. 

In my sessions I like to use an integrative method of gaining an understanding why the anxiety came along, how it's affecting your life and where your expectations are and then give you tools to fight it. 

If you would like to discuss your issue or ask more questions about my specialisms please do not hesitate to contact me by pressing the enquire now button on this page or going to my contact page and completing the form.